Archive for category Free Wood Post

Free Wood Post – (Hot Mic) Bob Costas: Availability Of Fox News Leads To Uninformed And Stupid Americans


(Hot Mic) Bob Costas: Availability Of Fox News Leads To Uninformed And Stupid Americans

December 5, 2012

By Sarah Wood

"Bob" "Costas" "guns" "availability" "Fox" "News" "viewers" "uninformed" "Free" "Wood" "Post"

Recently Sports Anchor Bob Costas caught a lot of flack from conservative critics who were disappointed that he would use his  football commentating position to go after gun ownership. He said after the murder/suicide of Kansas City Chiefs Jovan Belcher that “the availability of guns makes mayhem easier.” Costas was quoting a Jason Whitlock column and seemed to agree with the sentiment.

Now with as many arguments that can be made from either side of the gun issue, there is a new opinion from the sportscaster which also seems to be getting him into a bit of hot water with conservatives as well.

Costas was talking with some of the crew-members during a commercial break of his segment during halftime of Sunday Night Football. Apparently, he failed to turn off his mic during the break (or maybe he forgot it was on) and started on a rant about Fox News. His producers overheard the entire conversation with one reporting the story directly to Free Wood Post.

Costas was heard saying, “What the hell is with Fox News?! I mean really. Who the fuck do they think they are to always come in on the wrong side of history? Did you see this past election? All they did was deny the fact that Obama won until they couldn’t deny it any longer. They’re pathetic. Their viewers are pathetic. All they are is an extension of the Republican Party. Seriously, the availability of Fox News leads to uninformed and stupid Americans. It should be banned. They are dumbing down our nation. I see it when I travel in every airport, bar, and hotel lobby. It’s as if they are turning Americans into mindless drones to screw them over with Republican messaging that they have no clue is horrendously damaging for them…. What? We’re back on if five seconds? Okay… “ 

It seems the NBC producer of Sunday Night Football is an avid Fox News supporter and was outraged at Costas’ comments. He is staying anonymous, but wanted to make sure the American public knew all about the opinionated mayhem Costas seems to be bringing these days. Whether it be able to be criticized or not.

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – GOP Votes Down U.N. Disabilities Measure, Rolls Former Senator Bob Dole Out Back Near Dumpsters


Top of Form

GOP Votes Down U.N. Disabilities Measure, Rolls Former Senator Bob Dole Out Back Near Dumpsters

December 7, 2012

By Eric Hetvile

From a wheelchair, former Republican Senator Bob Dole made a courageous and spirited defense of the United Nations Convention on the Rights of Persons With Disabilities, but his fellow Republicans defeated its ratification and rolled the honorable Senator out back of the Capitol and left him near the dumpsters. He was discovered 3 hours later and Congressional staffers claimed a simple oversight.

The measure would not require any additional laws and would instead simply put pressure on other countries to abide by terms already laid out in the groundbreaking Americans With Disabilities Act of 1990, which was championed by Dole, an injured veteran, and signed by President George H. W. Bush.

Republican opposition claimed that such a United Nations mandate would force the United States to declare that all citizens, regardless of ability, deserve to live in dignity, safety and equality under the law. “This interferes with the sovereignty of the United States, ” said Senator Mike Lee (R-Utah), “What if we decided later that we wanted to change our mind on that? What then?”

Former Republican Senator Rick Santorum said that language in the treaty would mandate abortions for anyone who might possibly become disabled. He went on to say that ratification would also mean that people in wheelchairs would be allowed to use birth control, homeschooled children would be forced to watch Sesame Street, and it would violate religious freedoms because in the best religions God gives dignity to the disabled if he chooses to heal them. He maintained that if the government gives dignity to all disabled persons right away without having to pray and wait to be healed, that undermines God’s power.

A flustered Senator John Kerry (D-Massachusetts) asked, “Have you people lost your minds? Because if you have, ratification of this convention could help protect your disability under the law.”

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – Congress Must Increase Taxes And Cut Spending To Avoid Automatic Tax Increases and Spending Cuts


Congress Must Increase Taxes And Cut Spending To Avoid Automatic Tax Increases and Spending Cuts

December 7, 2012

By Eric Hetvile

"fiscal" "cliff" "congress" "cuts" "spending"

The United States Congress is rapidly running out of time to avoid falling off of the horrific “fiscal cliff”. It is almost universally understood by all that automatic tax increases and spending cuts which will occur without action will result in certain economic catastrophe for the country. And economic experts say that the only way to survive is by forging a deal to increase taxes and cut spending.

The fiscal cliff of forced cuts and tax increases worth more than $500 billion was created by the gridlock surrounding the Budget Control Act of 2011 and the fight to raise the debt ceiling. Republicans had refused to raise the debt ceiling which would allow the country to pay off money already spent by the country and felt that paying our bills would set a bad precedent for the future.

So lawmakers are hurrying to come to an agreement to raise taxes and cut spending to avoid certain disaster. If that does not occur, automatic tax increases and spending cuts will surely destroy the country.

Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – Veteran of 12 “Running of the Bulls” Says “No Fucking Way” He’s Going Out On Black Friday


Veteran of 12 “Running of the Bulls” Says “No Fucking Way” He’s Going Out On Black Friday

November 22, 2012

By Eric Hetvile

Sergio Bonaplata, who has participated in twelve ‘Running of the Bulls’ events in Pamplona, Spain, says there’s no fucking way he’s going out to any stores on Black Friday.

“Sure, I’ve broken several ribs, a forearm, an ankle, and even fractured my skull running with the bulls. I’ve also been gored in the ass twice. But I’m not crazy. I won’t go out there and risk my life even to get heavily discounted items.”

“Bulls are big and strong, but they are predictable. They run in a straight line for the most part. But people are absolutely crazy. They’ll pepper spray you, knife you, hit you with a waffle iron, or trample you to get the cheap stuff for sale. They’ll take out half of the stores’ workers and won’t even break a sweat. There’s no fucking way I’m even leaving the house. I’ll just pay the full price or buy it online or something.”

When asked what he might do instead, he proposed, “I don’t know, maybe I’ll go skydiving, free climbing, or base jumping.”

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – Glenn Beck: Doomsday is Here – The Only Thing Left We Can Do Is Crawl Back Under Our Rocks


Glenn Beck: Doomsday is Here – The Only Thing Left We Can Do Is Crawl Back Under Our Rocks

November 9, 2012

By Sarah Wood

It seems Glenn Beck has even more advice for his listeners. The day after the election is was in apparent shock and disbelief that President Obama won reelection. He told his viewers and listeners to buy farmland, move to “red” counties, and load up on guns and ammunition.

On today’s show he’s taken it a step further. He told his listeners not to take any chances whatsoever, and return to their safety zone under the rocks they crawled out from underneath to cast their ballots on Nov. 6th.

 ”Okay, folks – after a lot of thought and thorough examination of the situation at hand, I don’t think we can inhabit the same air space as those who seek to stifle our existence. I know a lot of you crawled out from underneath the rocks you were living under to cast your ballot for Mitt Romney to save the nation, but it’s just too dangerous. It’s just to… I don’t even know how to say this without crying… it’s just too – our nation is too far gone. At this point I don’t even think any amount of guns or ammunition or homeschooling or moving to uninhabited lands will protect us from those who seek to “enlighten” us. We need to go further. We need to fully shelter ourselves once again from this scary reality we live in. Please… please, I beg you… Doomsday is here –   the only thing left we can do is crawl back under our rocks. I’ll be broadcasting from underneath mine from here on out. Take your children – if you need food, grow it. We can’t be among those who work together any longer. May peace and God be with you.”

Well, this certainly could explain Beck and his viewers world view of things. They don’t seem to know or acknowledge more than what is directly in front of their nose. They seem to be aloof to the fact that there is an entire world out there, and people generally survive better when they work together, compromise, and have a sense of community.

On the other hand, this may quiet things down for a bit. Perhaps if all the under rock dwellers stay there for a while realistic solutions may actually have a chance at happening.

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – King of Saudi Arabia Relates to Romney Supporters, Invites Them to Become Citizens


King of Saudi Arabia Relates to Romney Supporters, Invites Them to Become Citizens

November 10, 2012

By Samantha Tonnell

Abdullah bin Abdul Aziz, the king of the monarchical country Saudi Arabia, invited supporters of Mitt Romney to his country Friday morning after he noticed that they have very similar beliefs to his.

“Americans who favored the candidate Mitt Romney are angry that Barack Obama was elected again and many are looking to move to another country because they don’t believe that Obama adheres to their values. I say to those people, you are welcome in Saudi Arabia, where I believe you are better suited. Let me show you that I understand and respect your values. I agree that homosexuality is immoral; therefore, gay marriage is illegal here, and those who sodomize are killed. I agree that contraception is immoral; therefore, it is illegal here, and those who use it will be imprisoned. I agree that sex before marriage is immoral; therefore, it is illegal here, and unmarried citizens caught fornicating get the whip. I agree that women are incapable of making their own choices; therefore, we tell them what to wear, what to learn, and who to marry.”

Aziz also noted that he and Romney supporters believe that religion is an essential component of government. He referred to monarchy, Saudi Arabia’s form of government, and said, “In my country, God chooses our leaders, not the people. As you know, that is the way it should be.”

He also stated that the Qur’an acts as the country’s governing text and related that to Romney supporters by citing that they often use Bible passages to support certain laws in the United States. He acknowledged that it may be difficult to convince the supporters to convert to Islam (Muslim status is required for citizenship), but addressed the issue by saying that Islam is “basically the same religion as yours but with different names for God and his prophet.”

At the end of his speech, Aziz added that Romney supporters would likely find some Saudi Arabian policies too liberal. For example, the country has a universal health care system, and abortion is not completely illegal; it is permitted in situations where the woman’s health is at risk.

Still, Aziz extended a hand to Romney supporters, stating, “Although we won’t agree on everything, as no two people ever will, most of our beliefs are the same. I hereby invite you to join our country, where you will surely be most content. I think we would get along very well; you would all fit in just fine here.”

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – Koch Brothers Invoice Romney 500 Million For ‘Services Not Rendered’


Koch Brothers Invoice Romney 500 Million For ‘Services Not Rendered’

November 7, 2012

By Jeff Musall

After Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney was soundly defeated in the 2012 election, the hits kept coming. The billionaire Koch brothers were huge contributors to his campaign, both directly and indirectly. It seems they aren’t happy with the result and are holding Romney responsible. Immediately after Romney conceded, the Koch boys emailed an invoice to Romney demanding 500 million dollars for what they termed “services not rendered.”

Thanks to the Citizens United ruling by the Supreme Court, unlimited amounts of money were poured into the Romney campaign by obscenely wealthy contributors who felt that they could buy the election. Like good capitalists, they of course expected a return on their investments in Mr. Romney.

That his campaign failed so miserably even though so much big money was used against him said that wouldn’t happen. Objective observers point out that there is just far too much money in politics on all sides. They also will point to the fact that backers of the Republican candidates threw huge amounts of money at the election and got very little in return. That’s the line of reasoning which brought the Koch brothers to seek reimbursement.

It’s hard to imagine any court rewarding the Koch’s wish and granting them payment in lieu of their expected services, but that isn’t apparently stopping them. What is accomplished by the invoicing of Romney is that Americans get to see that there are expectations in the political arena when very wealthy patrons contribute huge sums of money.

There was no immediate response from the Romney campaign.

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

1 Comment

Free Wood Post – Romney “Day One” Plans Now Involve Watching Season 3 of “Lost” on Netflix


Romney “Day One” Plans Now Involve Watching Season 3 of “Lost” on Netflix

November 7, 2012

By Richard Spall

Still stinging from his still-fresh electoral defeat to President Barack Obama, Mitt Romney announced that he has changed his plans for “day one” of the presidency from repealing “Obamacare”, re-instituting the Mexico City policy, solving undocumented immigration, submitting a jobs package, sitting down with Republicans and Democrats to forge a long-lasting bipartisanship, approving the Keystone Pipeline, sanctioning China for unfair trade, cutting the federal budget, reducing corporate tax rates, eliminating oppressive Obama regulations, and launching a manned mission to Kolob…to sitting down and watching Season 3 of the television series “Lost” on Netflix.

“I heard it’s pretty good. I don’t know though. A polar bear on an island? A smoke monster? How long can they drag this thing out? I just hope that they explain everything at the end. I can’t take another one of those “Seinfeld” or “Sopranos” endings.”

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – GOP: “God Must be Dead”


GOP: “God Must be Dead”

November 9, 2012

By S. McConnell

In the wake of watershed losses on Election Day, many of the more Evangelical members of the Republican Party have been left wondering what kind of God could have allowed President Barack Obama to be re-elected for a second term. Of those, some have decided He never would have let that happen, under any circumstances. It therefore stands to reason, they’ve concluded, that God must be dead.

“It pains me to say this– it’s hard to even think it,” said Pastor Michael Shane of Kentucky. “But for weeks I have been asking myself, ‘Is it possible that it is part of God’s plan for Obama to be re-elected?’ And ultimately the answer is, Nope. Not possible.”

He continued, “So once Obama won the electoral college, it was confirmed– someone must have gotten to God first and made it so He couldn’t keep Mitt Romney safe and carry him forward to a divine victory.”

Shane added, “Frankly, my money is on Nancy Pelosi.”

Other theologians have questioned whether God might have given Barack Obama a second term as a way to test good Christians; by putting them through deep suffering in order to determine the strength of their loyalty.

“I did wonder about that, at first,” said conservative and Christian Fundamentalist voter Ellen Kent of Decatur, GA.

“God does have a history of subjecting his most dedicated followers to difficult trials and tribulations to ensure that their devotion is pure. So at first I wanted to think that we were just being put through four more years of a blasphemous, satanic president who works to feed the poor and heal the sick as a test of our Christian faith,” she said.

“But then I realized that the amount of suffering that Obama’s second term will inflict on all of us is beyond the scope of anything that Mankind has ever had to endure since the beginning of time,” she added. “So I really don’t think this was God’s plan. He is simply not that cruel. There’s got to be another explanation– so the only answer is that sadly, there must no longer be a God.”

Kent noted that she was ultimately grateful for the fact that God was dead, because it meant He wouldn’t have to see the terrible path this country is on anymore.

“If Jesus were here today, I believe he would weep mightily for how lost we Real Americans are,” she said.

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Free Wood Post – Exit Polls Show Republicans Hurt By Things That Make Them Look Like Dickheads


Exit Polls Show Republicans Hurt By Things That Make Them Look Like Dickheads

November 9, 2012

By Eric Hetvile

2012 Presidential exit polls across the United States convincingly show that the country overwhelmingly rejected the Republican party in large part due to their vocal positions which make them look like dickheads.

From unbending positions on abortions for rape and incest, to forced trans-vaginal sonograms, generally insensitive talk about rape, blatant denial of rights for gay citizens, denigration of the poor and needy, complete disregard for science, marginalization of women, thinly veiled racist talk, and their constant stream of lies about pretty much everything – Americans cited these as a pretty good reasons to vote against Republicans.

“Yeah, I kind of don’t like when people are dickheads. I don’t really like dickheads representing me. I like people who are not dickheads,” said Richard Crane, N.M.

“These have usually been good issues for us. People used to like this crazy shit we’d say, ” said Todd Akin. “I mean, ‘legitimate rape’ was my nickname in college, for God’s sake. What has gotten into people?”

“Trans-vaginal sonograms? I thought this was gold! I used to bring them on dates” added a Virginia Republican operative who chose to remain anonymous.

“Rapes by God’s will has pretty much been my go-to thing, ” interjected Richard Mourdock. “People are very sensitive all of a sudden. I think this must have started since we started letting women vote. Boy, that was a mistake.”

This reporter abruptly halted the interviews for the Republicans’ own good.

 Free Wood Post.

 

, , , , , , ,

Leave a Comment

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 263 other followers

%d bloggers like this: